How are you doing with the little things? You know, the day-to-day “little” conflicts that we all experience. Walking down the street someone is walking toward you texting, looking down at their phone, never looking up, yet still walking toward you. Do you step out of their way or do you just have to say something to them in an aggravated tone?
No shame… that’s been me a time or two too many. You’re driving and someone cuts you off and then gives you the finger or maybe they are behind you honking impatiently at you to hurry up and go. Do you yell, curse, or flip the middle finger back?
What about when you are watching TV and the president or his supporters say something you hate or the anti-president talking head says something you oppose? Do you scream, name-call, or curse at the TV? How do you handle the cashier that’s slow or worse has a less than pleasant attitude even though you’ve been extra nice?
You see, all of this is important because the effects are cumulative and when the major conflicts happen in your life, somebody is bound to pay for the little things. That co-worker, your significant other, your children, your best friend. Somebody is feeling the effects of the little things. People are on edge and the encouragement to react to even the little conflicts in the worst, non-productive ways is all around us. News shows, talk shows, reality shows, music, social media, friends, family, and frenemies, are all willing to celebrate our bad behavior as long as it is for their cause.
Sorry Michelle Obama, but when they go low, we go low is the new battle cry. How low can you go is not just a Limbo chant, it is now our country’s chant, quickly being picked up by the rest of the world.
I’m concerned…
So, may I share what helps me with the little things?
- Take care of yourself. When you are rested, nourished, loved, playful and relaxed, it is easier to release the feelings you are holding on to related to the little things.
- Make sure your conflict resolution game is on point (top-notch). These days, these skills are no longer optional. They can make the difference between life or death, fired or promotion, harmony or chaos.
- Check in and be mindful. Know what’s going on around you and within you at all times so that you’re not reacting unconsciously. Keep track of how you react to the little things.
- Go out, see loved ones, meet people, connect, and learn patience, forgiveness, and kindness.
- Disconnect from your phone, the news, negative thoughts, and energy for at least two waking hours every day.
Oh, and maybe you can look up from your phone and stop texting while you are walking, or wave a hand of apology when you accidentally cut someone off and pay attention to how you are speaking to people when things aren’t going your way because, in someone else’s day, YOU are responsible for the little things. Yeah, I’ve been there too.
By taking the time to pay attention to how we are managing ourselves in handling the day-to-day little things we will gain the wisdom, strength, and patience to handle the rest.
In Love,
Dr. Lynne
